when i can ever learn to be non chalant...
weeks have passed... still ends are hard to meet... nid to pay for this.. nid to go there... nid to be fast (take cab).. nid to pamper myself n others..
When will it be the time when I dun worry?
sometimes i think.. will i get the heritage of my family genes? like gg crazy becos of money?
i try to tell myself.. money is a external thing.. should not affect me.. but it is neccessary to keep everyone happy.. to get you things that supposedly make ur life better.. more convenient..
why is it that everyone when we start working.. we look forward to all these luxury? to follow the norm of the company culture to own certain things? or is it that we feel we worked so hard.. hance the $$ should be used to our comfort building?
many times. i wished that my life can be simple and self-sufficient.. but it can never be now. now i dun expect to ask for allowance from mommy since i should be providing for her instead.. she is still providing for herself.. only with a burden less..
I try to make myself save.. by getting plans.. by getting new accounts.. it is not realli working.. instead i feel a little suffocated cos i see the numbers gg low.. i feel stressed up cos what i m making is not sufficient anymore.. i feel tired cos i dun have time to plan for more part time...
so i'm gg to set goals for myself now
1) no more extra classes
2) no more packages
3) no more cabs; wake up earlier!
These are the Top 3 killer in my life now.. spent way too much on signing up classes, buying mani/pedi packages/ foot reflex packages and taking cabs..
NO MORE....!
I wan to be bounce back from this thing and feel happy.. i dun wan to be bothered with money.. but at the same time.. this is the only reason why i wan to make it on my own...
the plan i have in mind seems more and more feasible.. i just need an appropriate time and space.. and of cos people ard me to help.. it is gg to be hard at first i know.. but i have to do this..