I recalled my first relationship in secondary 2. i was a young ger, naive and curious. always tot that love was like a fairy tale, i would live happily ever after with my bf. i always tot that he wud be able to accept me as who i am and all about me.
I only realised that it was wrong, cos i was not accommodating at all. It turn him off and in the end he left my life. I cried for a couple of days, going to school with swollen eyes. My teacher even asked abt my swell.
I fully understand that the meaning of having to sacrifice b4 you gain. When we were together, we sticked like malt candy. we meet everyday after school ( he was from a different school but he wud ride his bicycle to meet me) we go out on weekends. it lasted for 7 months. during this period, i skipped trainings, i missed outings with friends and teammates. No matter how accommodating they were, finally they got pissed and ignored me. I became someone who is lonely w/o my bf and there was no one i could confide to.
The only thing i was glad was that my friends welcome me back with open hearts after my break up. thou misunderstandings still surfaces due to work and other things, finally they were back in my life after so many years.
I told myself that no matter what, i won't allow these to happen. i went out with frds even i have a bf, staying at home. I now highly respect the personal space between a couple and we as individuals. I gain from this acknowledgement and respect.
My relationship is stronger on the basis of more mutual trust. I still have groups of frds who r still close with me and even know my bf personally. I felt much relieved when i didn't have to operate like there is no one else beside except me n him. instead of 2-people world, it was stress. cos the full focus of just me n him sometimes bore us.
My friends takes up an important part of my life. Friends stay forever, lovers dun. Of cos there is a way to balance bet them 2. i understand that it takes time and experience. If one dun feel the pain of losing frds, one wud not understand the need to have them back in their life and hence wud not learn how to balance frds and lovers.
Thank you my friends, who stayed with me through my pain, my sorrow, my depressed moments. I will share my happiness with all of you too.
Regrets only come upon when you did not do anything when you could have prevent it or revive somethings.
